Talking to Ray

I have known Ray for a long time. We met in southern Illinois and over time we became pretty good friends. I have observed Ray for a long time and out of my hubris have given suggestions to wake him up. The reason is I always find him stressed out of his job. It's like he is on a tread mill running as fast as he could but still finding himself going no where. One reason which brought us closer was the discussion on self improvement. Ray overcame a lot of obstacles and got himself an education as a non traditional student. He aced many courses even though he was working full time. He finally got a  liberal arts education that he is fittingly proud of. He had the fortune of reading some great books that changed his life. Which is a point I whole heartedly share. A good book can change one's life and one should make every possible attempt to find such books.
 He told me about some of the family problems he was having. His mother who is cruising at 90 plus years of age was recently diagnosed with multiple fractures and is in severe pain. One of his brother's son is missing. Another of his brother's daughter was caught shoplifting and in possession of amphetamine and is in big trouble. His own relationship with a mutual friend Jen is not working out. His work load busting at seams and his own health is precarious. I wish I could help him cope but all I have are suggestions which may not sound right when the going gets tough and you are impatient to turn your life around.